He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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