What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
