Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i wish my penis had a tongue
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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