How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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