quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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