we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
