I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
