I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
