check it out our google latitudes are spooning
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
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