Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
tell me about the fingering
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