After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
