she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
