this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
This is my gift to your gina
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
