Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
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