Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
