i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
How does it feel to date your dad?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
