After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
