love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Randomize
