oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
