I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
