drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
