She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Randomize
