every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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