when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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