I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
