I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
did you just send me my own nude
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
