So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
