I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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