I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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