The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
i now understand why vodka
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
