They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Randomize
