I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
