This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
