Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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