Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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