Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I wish there were birth control emojis
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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