Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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