There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
