God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
