I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Randomize
