I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
