Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
too bad you live with your parents still
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
