I wannas sexs uuuuu
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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