Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
