dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
