i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
