omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
