one two three fourrrrnication!
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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