oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
