she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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